I was reading through an old journal entry last night, a little story that should have made me smile remembering it.
However, without warning, I just broke down in tears. I sort of felt it then, that she had left.
My Grandma R.
I knew she was in the hospital and wasn't doing well, and that it was only a matter of time.
I went to bed shortly afterward. I hadn't been feeling too well yesterday as it was and couldn't keep my eyes open anymore.
When I awoke around 3am I saw the posts on Facebook. She had indeed gone on to be with Grandpa R.
Tried falling back asleep, but my stomach was still bothering me. Around 4:30am I decided to be productive, so I did the American thing and went to the grocery store in my pajamas. Got my grocery shopping for the week done and was able to fall back asleep again after I got back.
Got up again around 9am, got dressed and went to my hair appointment. Came back and did some cleaning.
I'm over 5000 miles away, and there's really nothing I can do except just go about life as normal.
I've had to say a few too many goodbyes in recent years, and they're never easy. Although knowing it's coming makes it a little easier. When my Grandma O died last year, it was quite sudden, and I regretted not having gone back home for Christmas that year because I would've been able to see her one last time.
But Grandma R, I'm glad I got to see you when I did, so I have that last
good memory of you. I know you're happy now with Grandpa, but I sure
will miss you.
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| A picture of them together, as they should be. |
2 comments:
So sorry to hear about your grandma. I'm glad you got to see her before she left. Being away from family is hard especially in those times. I know it's weird to say, but when my grandma died I was on the plane the next day (mind you, it's UK to Germany to cheap airlines make it possible), so I was there for the whole family coming together, which was very very nice. I think sad times can bring out nice things too. Like the family supporting each other and remembering together. Sorry that you have to miss the 'good' parts of people passing on. I send extra virtual hugs!
Yes, being together with family during those times is very nice. If there was going to be a funeral I would consider going back, but I'm pretty sure there's not going to be. Hopefully though, I can go pay my respects the next time I'm on that side of the world.
And thank you for your thoughts. Virtual hugs gratefully received!
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